Featured Relationships

8 Ways to Crush 2020

Make it the Best Year Ever!

By Bela Gandhi
Chief Psychotic Optimist of the Smart Dating Academy

Have you had a good year, and a good decade? I sure hope so. Now, do you want to make 2020 the best year, and best start to a decade ever? Follow these 8 commandments and you’ll be in a great place!

1) Become a Psychotic Optimist – Psychotic Optimism is believing that awesomeness will come to you – no matter what. For example, if you’re single, you will no longer say, “I’m too old to find love – who knows if it’ll happen.” You replace it with, “Love will come to me…it’s a when, not an if!” And then you act in accordance with that! You keep yourself UP because you know that love will come to you. Even if you go on 20 bad dates, you stay psychotically optimistic – and that keeps you in the game!



2) Get Out of Your Own Way – Stop thinking negative thoughts that keep you stuck. Identify things that you tell yourself that are keeping you mired in concrete. If you tell yourself you’ll never start a business, you’ll never start a business. Set an intention for something that you’d really like to do or become this year. Write it down. DO one thing each day that moves you in that direction. The only thing that will get you what you want is clear and dedicated action in that direction.

3) Practice Daily Gratitude – This is something that Oprah preaches, and has been shown to promote high levels of happiness. Write down ten things that you are grateful for EVERY single day. It forces you to look for what is good EVERY single day. And not generic things like “I’m grateful for health.” Specific things like, “I’m grateful that my son called me out of the blue today and chatted with me for 30 minutes.”

4) Figure out the one thing you would love to have and GO ALL IN – Think about the thing you’d most like to do this year – and then go all in. One of my favorites, Rachel Hollis, says this – and she is right. You can’t have ten big goals to work on at once – pick one and CRUSH it.

5) Know Where You’re Going – When you want to achieve something, you have to know where you are RIGHT now before you can plot out your direction. For example, if you want to build a million dollar business, you have to know what you have right now (maybe you have a brand, a website, a sales force, an assistant) – and how you will use these assets to build your revenue where you want to go.

6) Spend time on things that you LOVE and bring you fun – Take stock of what you did in 2019 – look at your calendar or your photo memories. Think of the top 5 things that you did that brought you enjoyment or fun. Vow to do more of that category in 2020. Similarly, look back at the things that you feel wasted your time / were bad — and do NONE of those in 2020.

7) Focus on Experiences Instead of Things – We focus a lot on material things in our culture – retail therapy to pull us out of a mood. We buy handbags, shoes, clothes, makeup, and so many other things to distract ourselves with a temporary dopamine hit. Instead of spending money on things which don’t bring us lasting joy, spend money on experiences that you can share wtih others or do on your own. Go to your first opera, visit a national park, hike the Grand Canyon, go to Alaska, run a 5K. These create joy, confidence and memories that no one can take away from you.

8) Stop Letting Other People Get you Down (Projection) – As Taylor Swift says, ‘the haters gonna hate hate hate…” and your job in 2020 is to NOT let it get to you. Maybe you have a sister who is secretly jealous of you, so she tries to bring you down with little cuts or insults. You have a friend who tells you that you’re a bad friend. So much of people’s meanness is actually a mirror for their own self-esteem issues. The people who tell you that you dress inappropriately are probably the ones who worry about their own looks. The people that accuse us of being dramatic are the ones that bring drama. Don’t let projection fool you – see it for what it is, and bless the person on your way OUT.

If you follow these eight rules in 2020, there is no doubt you are going to have more fun, love and success than ANY year before!

For more information visit www.smartdatingacademy.com.



6 Comment

Join the discussion and tell us your opinion.

  1. It’s deep

  2. Thank you so much Mrs. I really appreciate those thoughts , i’m a big fan of Steve Harvey from Haiti so he is the one who inspires me to write donw my goals and have a vision board so I can’t wait to see what 2020 will bring for me. first of all these things I put God first!
    Hey Steve I’d like to come to your show because I have it on my vision board brother.

  3. Wow! Most of these commandments are so related to my life…. Life is so full of daily challenges. I find it necessary to hold on to God’s word, my faith, my trust in Him, and allowing the Holy Spirit to lead me. This gives me an opportunity to realize how God can work it out. My lack of patience can sometimes cause some anxiety, and that’s when i go into a quiet place to pray. Those worldly things can interfere with his plans for you. Keep Praising and Thanking God while working on your dreams.

  4. Yes I needed that info. Bcs I think I’m to old too.
    Even though I’m easy on the eyes.. my bed is still cold.
    Men that I’ve come in contact with don’t want to commit..
    They want the cookies but don’t want to do nothing for it… I want A real man that values me. And makes me His Priority like I do him…..

  5. Thank You, Will do… Most important to me for this Year is to “JUMP”.

  6. I need major help with dating, I live in Dallas, TX and in the last few years i was diagnosed with a severe illness that is unbeatable. Just trying to find the one for me was hard and still is. Now at the age of 28 to becoming 29, I don’t want to die alone. How can find the right one that will love me for me and nothing else?

Leave A Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

More like this

The Man Hunt | Motivated With Steve Harvey
5 More Dating Mistakes