Featured Achievement

The Power of Perseverance

How Staying the Course in Your Relationship is the Sexiest Thing Ever

By Amanda Garrigus

We all know how exciting the first blush of a relationship can be. The butterflies, the bells and whistles, the all-consuming desire. It’s beyond intoxicating. It’s utterly mesmerizing. Romantic Comedies live and die on the power of that moment, so do some pretty intense thrillers. It’s a feeling we all long for, fight for, cling to, and it’s the best thing ever. Or is it? The early days of a relationship can be mind-blowing for sure, but in my view, the really good stuff, the stuff that’s truly worth fighting for, comes year later. Now, I’m no relationship expert, but I am someone who’s been married for nearly twenty years. I can hear the collective gasps. I get it. The reality of that number hits me between the eyes not infrequently. In a nation where less than fifty percent of marriages make it, I take my twenty year sojourn as a pretty remarkable achievement, and I’m here to talk truth from the other side of those electric first days.

I know there are many of you out there who think that the first weeks and months of a relationship are the be all and end all, and that every month, year, nay, decade after that are just steps closer to utter boredom and disinterest. I used to think that too. But I stand here, living proof that relationships can get better over time. Soooo much better. Think about it this way. When you’re in the early stages of, well, anything, you know almost nothing about it. Sure, the newness is exciting, but it can also be awkward and clumsy. You don’t know quite how things fit, and the nuances, the cadence and rhythm, aren’t yet finessed. There’s plenty sexy about fumbling about hungrily, but you know what’s even better? Knowing exactly what you want and having a partner who’s an expert at delivering. Does it sound like I’m talking about sex? Well, I am. But, everything I’ve said also applies to your lives together outside the bedroom. You and your partner go from being a newly formed band to The Beatles circa A Hard Day’s Night. You’re at the top of your game, working as a well oiled machine.

Suffice it to say, commitment in a relationship has to be earned. Never waste your time on someone who’s disrespectful, abusive or an obvious bad fit. It’s also equally important to acknowledge that one person cannot be all things. But, if the two of you line up on the things that matter most, like world view, sexual appetite, lifestyle preferences, hopes for the future, family goals, and financial ones, then your relationship is probably worth investing in over the long haul. You will have some pretty crappy times, that’s basically guaranteed, and those trying times could spans months, or even, ehm, years. But, if you are both committed to emerging victorious with your hearts, minds, spirits and relationship intact, then you will be rewarded with more love, understanding and, yes, mind-blowing sex than you could ever have imagined. In my view, the fairy tale isn’t all about the the wedding. It’s about your prince, or princess, looking at you twenty years in and saying they love you more than ever before. It’s knowing with absolute time-tested certainty that there is no one you’d rather be walking through this crazy world with, because they get you, they really know you, and they love you anyway. That’s sexy. That’s #relationship goals, and that’s worth fighting for.

8 Comment

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  1. Mr. Harvey,
    Your shows has been an inspiration for me and my family. There’s not a day my mother,who’s 80yrs old doesn’t miss a day just to watch your love towards other. Keep up the good work and GOD will continually bless you and your family.
    Won’t he do it🗿

  2. Thank You!
    I needed this, because after 30yrs of Abundant Blessings and Uncountable Miracles Bliss and Misery and Happiness and Heartache and Joy and Pain and Ups and Downs and Sooo,So,Sooo Much, we’ve reached the point of Sickness and Health and it’s tough!
    Really taking its toll and watching Your show whenever possible,gives some much needed inspiration to carry on and face each new day with renewed Hope.

    God’s Continued Blessings to You and Yours,Steve.

  3. Love your shows also how u and your wife help all the young people

  4. Mr. Steve Harvey keep on keeping on, your a Real brother who tells it like it is, especially when it’s time to be real about life issue. God bless you and keep up the good work.

  5. Very inspiring and informing as well! Looking forward to get into one 😎

  6. What a great article! Did notice a few typos so if you ever need an editor, I’m happy to volunteer. This really is a beautifully written piece with just a few minor flaws. Thank you for the message and insight ✨♥️🙏🏻♥️✨

    1. Thanks Margarita, please let us know what you see so we can pass along to our copy editor. Thank you.

  7. Yes!!! Perseverance in a relationship is the true test of a union. You both have to want it. No one should have to want what you want and vice a versa. Does not make the other person wrong, bad or ugly. Love is a beautiful thing! Though I choose trust over Love because you can Love someone you trust and you can’t trust someone you Love.

    Grateful to have had that even though some stories come to an end. I will do it all over again knowing this time around will be even more so the better.


    Thank you Mr. Harvey always inspiring!

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